Breaking up with the Kardashians.

As a seasoned marketing expert, I take ad and profile writing seriously. However, I write blogs about men, women and marketing purely for fun. Single or not, feel free to enjoy them!

I read the other day that the Kardashians have signed on for another 3 years with the E! Network. This news had a grievous impact on me. However, I decided to turn that into positive inspiration for this blog. Thank you to my Kardashian family of muses.

When to break it off

If  anyone should know when to break it off sooner than later, you think it would be Kim and yet…

Askmen.com discusses signs indicating that a relationship needs to end, for instance “yearning for independence” and “a change of perception”.

That last one has to do with those moments when you realize that what you once liked, you now don’t like. For instance, I once liked how curvaceous Kim was because I thought her normal, healthy weight served as a good example to women. Now I’d like to see all that meat canned and shelved. By canned I mean fired, of course.

How to break it off

When I googled “how to break up”, this article on wikipedia was listed along with the words “7 steps with pictures”.

With pictures? Really?

The first tip is to think about why you’re breaking up and, sure enough, there’s a picture of a man thinking. Genius. Better still, there’s a zoom icon in case you want to get a really good look of him thinking.

Longest relationship ever

I thought it would be fun to check out the longest relationship ever (besides that of the Kardashians and F! Network).

According to an article on aarp.org, the happy couple is Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher who at the time of the article (written last year) were married 86 years.

Longest running advertisement

Yogi Bear’s “Only You Can Prevent Forest Fires” campaign and Tootsie Roll’s “How many licks” TV spot (not Lil’ Kim’s song) are both quoted as the longest.

However,  Discount Tire’s commercial made it into the Guiness Book of World Records so that’s the one I’m featuring.

Ironically, this commercial is no more than 15 seconds long. So, essentially, it’s the shortest longest.

This spot doesn’t seem to be in the best interest of Discount Tire. Yet, the ad does one basic brilliant technique – it surprises us. Better still, it does so in a way that completely disarms the viewer. It not only shows an elderly woman breaking its windows, the commercial itself breaks the mold. By being unique and entirely different from other tire ads, it stands out. It’s also really likeable.

The other day, I had a client hire me to write his online dating profile. He filled out the personality quiz, which is the first step, and then he filled out my follow up questions. At that time, he included a note, “Kate, can you make me sound funny? Here are some lines from other profiles that I think are good. Can you do something like that?”

Nowhere in all those answers did he sound funny. In fact, he was a fascinating guy who was serious about his work and friends. Still, he not only wanted me to make him sound like someone he’s not, he wanted me to copy clever lines from the profiles of others  – worst idea ever and biggest mistake in advertising. Never, ever falsely advertise and never copy your competition. All that will do is make you one of many. By promoting yourself and your unique traits, you stand out against them, which is the key to success.

Advertising techniques are a great way to make your profile get noticed among the thousands out there. An even better approach is to hire me – after all, I’m trained in all the techniques so that you don’t have to be.

Check out my samples of online dating profilesand LinkedIn profiles, and see for yourself.  Or, simply get started with the personality quiz. It’s the first step to a great online dating profile. The second is to hire me. Also, if you like what you’ve read, then please join me on Twitter and  Facebook page.