Martha Stewart’s online dating profile. A critique.

Usually when I critique online dating profiles, I’m either getting paid for it (I write online dating profiles, of course, but I also do phone consultations) or I do the critique here, on this blog, using only an excerpt from a random online dating profile so that it’s kept anonymous.

However, given that Martha Stewart’s online dating profile on match.com is public knowledge, I’ve cut and pasted it here. You’ll find my critiques throughout in red.

ABOUT HER & WHO SHE’S LOOKING FOR

You may recognize me from my pictures. Yes, it’s really me. On the subject of her pictures – all are glamor shots that have clearly been photoshopped. That’s alright, but only to a degree. Limit this kind of shot to the main photo. For the others, be real. When you’re 71 years old, which she is, it stands to reason that you’ll have wrinkles. So what. Don’t photoshop your years off your face when you can’t shave them off your age. 

Another point about her photos – not one shows her doing activities that she loves. Remember that photos are an opportunity to deliver subtle clues about yourself so that you catch the eye of someone like-minded. For instance, if you love to cook, show a photo of yourself cooking. If you love horses, post a photo of yourself on your horse. It’s important to have yourself “front and center” in all your shots. However, use your surroundings to maximize your message.

I’ve been curious about online dating for a long time, but, like lots of people, have been reluctant to take the leap. I’m just now getting around to it for a couple reasons. After recently writing and publishing my new book, “Living the Good Long Life,” I was reminded how central good relationships are to happiness and longevity. Also, I’ve always been a big believer that technology, if used well, can enhance one’s life. So here I am, looking to enhance my dating life. Good lord, who cares about this? Martha, if you were anyone else, you’d have mere moments to intrigue your reader. Use the opener to do just that. Who cares how curious you were about online dating? Who cares about your belief in technology. And “duh” – of course you’re looking to enhance your dating life. You’re on match.com not TMZ. 

The most interesting part of this paragraph is that you recently had an accomplishment – talk about that (without overdoing a book plug). In fact, you’ve had an enormous amount of accomplishments in your life, this is but one of them. Sum up some of the most fascinating highlights. Sprinkle in some self-effacing humor too so that you market yourself in a way that’s confident, but also disarming.

Here’s how I’d define myself: Curious about everything. Love learning. An adventurous spirit. Why define yourself with adjectives? Do it with anecdotes. Curious about everything, are you? Were you like that as a child? If so, tell us a cute anecdote. I too am curious about everything. When I was little, I tied all my sister’s bras together, filled them with fruit and then hung them across our lawn because I wondered if they would make pretty fruit baskets. 

Surely you have stories like that. 

What about your adventurous spirit? Martha, think of all you’ve done and all the risks that you’ve taken. Include short anecdotes about them.

I’m told that I’m a specific person, and that the efficiency of online dating might be a good way for me to find that needle in the haystack.There’s no need to go into the benefits of online dating. Keep the focus on you.

So while I’m open to all kinds of people You say that you’re open to all kinds of people. However, your settings clearly indicate that you want someone younger than you – only. You are into men 55-70 years old. I mention this because boomers can be so age discriminating. Time and again I see settings like these. Why not go lower and higher?  It’s tough to meet the “one” at any age. It gets harder as we get older. Be open to you own age group too. It’s wonderful to have a match who understands your musical references, your political sensitivities, your memories. Don’t limit yourself, and love to be surprised, here’s what I know I appreciate in a man: Someone who’s intelligent, established, and curious; and who relishes adventure and new experiences as much as I do. You haven’t established enough about your adventures and love of new experiences for a man to see himself in your life. Adventure and new experiences mean different things to different people. Again, show what you mean by sharing a few highlights.

Someone who can teach me new things. A lover of animals, grandchildren, and the outdoors. Young at heart. You love animals and yet this is the only time you’ve mentioned them. What about the outdoors? What do you enjoy doing and where?

Please send me a message if you fit the bill. Your profile is so nondescript that anyone can fit the bill. You may get matches, but you’ll get a number of wrong matches. Instead, be specific about who you are so that you attract the right matches while weeding out the wrong ones. I travel frequently, so geography is but a detail.

Lastly, if your shows and your biographical information are any indication, you’re a strong, fascinating, dynamic woman with a great sense of humor and resilience. This profile is so blase and it shows none of your passion or playfulness. Add more of “you” into it and show some of your joie de vivre.

A final note about biggest online dating profile writing mistake:

The biggest mistake singles make when writing their online dating profile is that they end up being quite average. Even a brilliant woman like Martha Stewart can come across as quite plain. Yet, she isn’t. Nor are you. Everyone is unique and interesting. Moreover, it’s usually the fun little quirks – and not  the big accomplishments – that make people so endearing.

Increase your chances of finding the one by having me write your online dating profile. I use marketing techniques to make your profile persuasive. I use your words, expressions and anecdotes so that it genuinely sounds like you.

Better yet, I use all your unique aspects to ensure that you come across every bit as captivating as you surely are.

Have a look at my online dating profile samples and see for yourself. Or, just get started now by  completing the online personality quiz and pressing submit. You’ll be amazed by what I can do with your answers.