I was talking to a friend the other day who asked, “How’s your little side business going.” Cringing, I patiently answered, “I have a two-week waiting list. I’m negotiating a speaking engagement in LA. Plus, a PHD who’s written 33 self-help books and was a guest on Oprah has recommended me. In fact, he called me an angel for doing what I do”.
“Really? You’re serious?” he said incredulous.
“Yes. What’s so hard to believe – that someone called me an angel or that writing dating profiles is important?”
“Both”, he said with surprisingly little fear of mortal danger.
Granted, I understand his confusion about me being called an angel; I once added white vinegar to his drinking water. (I know now that what I did was wrong. Still, we worked next to each other and he whistled constantly. I had to make it stop.)
However, what I found notable was his disbelief that writing dating profiles could be more than a mere “little side business”. We’re both in advertising (I still do occasional contracts). Sometimes we work on multi-million dollar clients who not only have a lot of money to spend, they have a lot of money to lose. For all its irreverence and fun, advertising is serious business. I can see why some colleagues might think that writing dating profiles is trivial by comparison. After all, I’m dealing with individuals, not corporations. I’m also dealing with profiles that add up to $140 rather than productions that add up to millions. Yet, with this “little side business”, I’ve gone from making a living to making a difference.
Truthfully, I didn’t understand the significance of this service myself when I started. While I’m coming clean, initially I did think it would be a “little side business”. I had no idea how important a good online dating profile could be. Nor did I understand its potential effects.
Crafting a good profile requires that you take stock in all the quirks, qualities and anecdotes that make up “you”. It then requires that you put a positive spin on yourself. The most satisfying effect I’ve noticed when writing dating profiles for clients is that, when you present a person in a positive light, they inevitably see themselves in a positive light. It’s a tremendously uplifting feeling and can have an amazing impact on a person’s confidence.
I once did the dating profile of a woman who had just come out of an abusive relationship that had affected her self-worth. We worked together to uncover her unique aspects and then – from her own words and anecdotes – I crafted a fantastic profile. Understand that when I say it was fantastic, I’m not taking the credit. It was that good because it reflected her. In the end, she wrote to me to say that the process had significantly raised her self-esteem and, as a result, she was ready to pick a partner who measured up rather than pick one who was not worthy.
Over time, I’ve learned that a good dating profile not only makes online suitors think you’re special, it can make you think so too. Better still, it sets you up to choose appropriately. So, even if you don’t hire a professional ad writer to craft your online dating profile (me!), I nevertheless suggest that you treat that “summary of you” with all the respect and care it deserves.
For advice on how to market yourself online, feel free to check out the online dating samples of my work. Or, start crafting a better online dating profile right now by completing the personality quiz. It costs nothing to do, but it’s an important first step in writing a profile that stands out. Once you’ve completed the quiz, all you have to do is incorporate some the best answers into your dating profile. Better yet, hire me to do it. I’m trained to know what to pick and where to put it.
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