Should online dating industries show more heart?

I have – or rather, had – a hidden account on one of the free dating sites. I do this to keep informed.  At one point, I had a question about privacy that wasn’t addressed in its FAQs. I wrote to Customer Service several times, but never received a reply. Eventually I included the question on my profile, which was then submitted for approval. Despite the fact that the revised profile was approved – and presumably read – the question remained unanswered. Out of curiosity, I decided to post a link to my writing service just to see if the site’s reps do, in fact, read profiles pending approval.  Apparently, they do because I was promptly banned for promoting my site.

Clearly there are people behind the site. There’s just no customer service.

It seems most free sites operate in this way because they don’t charge.  Yet, fact is, these sites make enviable cash through advertising. That clients provide revenue-generating personal information and don’t even receive common courtesy in return is inexcusable.

Somehow, it’s ironic that sites whose primary benefit is about building relationships, have none at all with their customers.

The media too is benefiting from the popularity of online dating. More newspapers are writing about it, thus bringing it further into the mainstream. However, some are publishing “stats” from dating sites as though they’re facts. okCupid compiles all kinds of interesting information culled from user behavior and quizzes. It’s brilliant, “ego-enticing” marketing. It isn’t, however, rigorously conducted research and, in my view, media is irresponsible when presenting it as such.

On the subject of irresponsible, I’ve also seen TV talk shows lure viewers with the promise of learning valuable information on online dating. Generally, the advice is shallow and of little value. Sometimes it’s so contrary to intelligent marketing that  anyone taking the advice could risk failure, which in turn can hurt the self-esteem.

Lastly, I recently had two clients send me online dating profiles that they paid good money to have professionally written.  One man paid close to two-hundred dollars for what was supposed to be a premium service. It was filled with adjectives and sentences that had clearly been a template. It also was replete with spelling errors. There were even sections with incomplete sentences. The heart, soul and general beauty of this poor man was completely disregarded. His profile could have been anyone’s. To add insult to injury, he wasn’t even able to reach the company to discuss his dissatisfaction.

When I saw what they had written for him, I was heartsick. Heartsick might seem to be an overdramatic response. However, since launching this service, I’ve learned that people put their hearts and hopes into finding love.  In addition, they put all their trust into you being able to help them. It’s morally repugnant to not take your role seriously when dealing with people’s emotions.

All businesses have a responsibility to clients, but businesses that deal with such delicate aspects of humanity have an even greater responsibility.  If you agree, please tweet or pass along this blog to others, especially those in the dating industry. We really need to get serious and have heart.

If you’ve come to this blog for help with your dating profile, then get started by completing the  personality quiz. It’s designed to help you see yourself from a unique perspective. From there,  you can incorporate some of the answers into your dating profile to make it more dynamic.

Better still, hire me to do it. I’m trained to know what to pick and where to put it. See for yourself by checking out the online dating samples of my work.

Lastly, if you like the blogs, then you’ll like the tweets. Would also love to see you on Facebook.