All posts tagged with online dating profile writer
Online dating and cuckoos.
Remember when Kathy Bates went from being a caring sweetie to a crazy lady who then enslaved and tortured James Caan in blind obsession? She was awesome! Remember when Edward Norton went from being a sweet, soft-spoken victim to a cool, manipulative sociopath without a pulse or a conscience? I loved him. And who could possibly have expected mild-mannered Kevin Spacey in Usual Suspects to be a criminal mastermind? I love plot twists and nutty characters in movies. On online… read more →
Online dating and critical thinking.
One of my friends was concerned about online dating because she heard you could meet a lot of creeps on dating sites. I asked her if she had ever met creeps in a bar. She said she had. I asked her if she had ever met creeps at parties. She said yes. I asked her if she had ever met creeps at weddings. Guess what? She had. The point is you can meet creeps anywhere. Online dating sites don’t have… read more →
Online dating and the meaning of fun.
Ever see a dog’s head tilt in bewilderment as you talk to it? I find myself doing that when I read the words “I like to have fun” in a dating profile. It’s perplexing in the way that fanny packs are considered dorky, but cycling jerseys with pockets at the back aren’t. I never had a Sylvan Centre tutor but, as far as I know, implicit in the meaning of fun is pleasure, isn’t it? Nobody has fun and dislikes… read more →
Dating profiles that “prefer not to say”: about as fair as William Shatner getting work.
The first time I truly grasped the meaning of, “life’s not fair” was when I was 12 years old. That was the day I was told I probably wouldn’t grow any taller, and that my chest would not probably not get any bigger than that of my Aunt – the one known for her personality. Since then I’ve come up against much injustice. Carrying one teeny item over to the presumably “fast” self-serve area of a grocery store only to… read more →
Online dating profiles and spidey senses.
There are some things in life that we know never to trust. For instance, with the exception of cheerleaders, everyone knows not to trust an outhouse in the middle of a forest in the middle of the night. Obviously serial killers – not to mention slugs (gross) – will be lurking there. Everyone also knows not to trust a country song that starts out happy. It’s just stringing you along for that tragic moment when someone leaves, dies, cheats or… read more →
Is your online dating profile kind of like birth control?
I read a few dating profiles of single, straight women on a dating site today and decided that I could, quite possibly, put a fork to my eye. Ladies, for the record, the number one most effective form of birth control is a profile of deep emotions that culminates with verses by Rumi. A lot of the women’s dating profiles read like Harlequin novels – you know those books that are all the rage among men (yes, I’m being facetious… read more →
Dating profile pictures that make me go “oh come on!”
When Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin named their child, Apple. I thought, “Oh come on.” When Madonna kissed Britney, I cringed and said, “Oh come on.” When a friend showed me a Youtube video of Bush dancing with an African band, I spat out the tea I was sipping and laughing like a lunatic, said, “Oh come on” followed by “oh gross, sorry”. The tea sort of landed on his computer screen, but anyway… Recently I visited Match.com, PlentyofFish and… read more →
Can you spot the celebrities dating online?
I was on Match.com the other day and saw Elizabeth Hurley online. How exciting and, truth be told, how surprising. For one, I thought she was married and yet there she was looking for long term. Second, I happen to know that the picture she posted was at least 8 years old (not to mention a bit blurry), which is a little bit deceptive, let’s face it. Nevertheless I was pretty giddy. I mean, Elizabeth Hurley was online dating! I… read more →
Is there a high mortality rate among singles dating online?
I’ve seen so many online dating profiles claiming, “life is short” that I’m beginning to think I just might be able to max out my credit cards and get away with it. That upside aside, do online daters have some freakishly high mortality rate that I didn’t know about? For the record, I know about a half a dozen people in their 90’s who would disagree with life being short. I suggest not using that claim on your online dating… read more →
Looking for a good-hearted woman or an honest man? So is everyone else who’s dating online.
Good lord, where are all the good-hearted women? I see so many men’s dating profiles looking for this particularl type of female that I wonder if they really are that elusive. Waylon Jennings and Willie Nelson knew of one such woman because I heard them singing about her. Does that mean men would have better luck if they cut short their online dating site subscriptions and head to the nearest honky tonk? Is that where these women are hiding? My… read more →
