All posts tagged with online dating profile writing

Some things go on forever. A wail by Mariah Carey is a good example; as is a wail by anyone passing a kidney stone. Besides that, Elvis and Jim Morrison, never die. For that matter, neither does Keith Richards even though he’s long overdue. And, if you’ve ever been forced to attend midnight mass with your family at St. Augustine’s Parish in Montreal on December 25, 1978, you’d know better than anyone that certain things go on forever no matter… read more →

Remember when Kathy Bates went from being a caring sweetie to a crazy lady who then enslaved and tortured James Caan in blind obsession? She was awesome! Remember when Edward Norton went from being a sweet, soft-spoken victim to a cool, manipulative sociopath without a pulse or a conscience? I loved him. And who could possibly have expected mild-mannered Kevin Spacey in Usual Suspects to be a criminal mastermind? I love plot twists and nutty characters in movies. On online… read more →

One of my friends was concerned about online dating because she heard you could meet a lot of creeps on dating sites. I asked her if she had ever met creeps in a bar. She said she had. I asked her if she had ever met creeps at parties. She said yes. I asked her if she had ever met creeps at weddings. Guess what? She had. The point is you can meet creeps anywhere. Online dating sites don’t have… read more →

Ever see a dog’s head tilt in bewilderment as you talk to it? I find myself doing that when I read the words “I like to have fun” in a dating profile. It’s perplexing in the way that fanny packs are considered dorky, but cycling jerseys with pockets at the back aren’t. I never had a Sylvan Centre tutor but, as far as I know, implicit in the meaning of fun is pleasure, isn’t it? Nobody has fun and dislikes… read more →

The first time I truly grasped the meaning of, “life’s not fair” was when I was 12 years old. That was the day I was told I probably wouldn’t grow any taller, and that my chest would not probably not get any bigger than that of my Aunt – the one known for her personality. Since then I’ve come up against much injustice. Carrying one teeny item over to the presumably “fast” self-serve area of a grocery store only to… read more →

There are some things in life that we know never to trust. For instance, with the exception of cheerleaders, everyone knows not to trust an outhouse in the middle of a forest in the middle of the night. Obviously serial killers – not to mention slugs (gross) – will be lurking there. Everyone also knows not to trust a country song that starts out happy. It’s just stringing you along for that tragic moment when someone leaves, dies, cheats or… read more →

I read a few dating profiles of single, straight women on a dating site today and decided that I could, quite possibly, put a fork to my eye. Ladies, for the record, the number one most effective form of birth control is a profile of deep emotions that culminates with verses by Rumi. A lot of the women’s dating profiles read like Harlequin novels – you know those books that are all the rage among men (yes, I’m being facetious… read more →