All posts tagged with online dating profiles

Spring is here. Birds are chirping. Flowers are blooming. Even crows seem a little more melodic. And yet, on online dating sites, people are going all Charlie Sheen on us! Anger, depression, bad spelling – it’s entertainment at it’s most dramatic. On that note, I present “Online Dating. The Agony, Part 14”.   Before you begin, let me reiterate that these excerpts do not represent the norm. Most people are genuine, earnest, and doing their best. They just need help… read more →

The other day on the Daily Show, Jon Stewart showed a clip from one of Sarah Palin’s riveting speeches. Say what you will about her, but she’s an inspiration. The woman indefatigably uses her mouth despite overwhelming evidence that she should stop. Blithely she spouts and never, ever, lets good judgment get in the way. Naturally, this brings to mind certain online dating profiles that I come across while scanning dating sites every day. Like our Sarah, some people filling… read more →

If online dating profiles were Lays Potato Chips, I too could not “eat just one”. Usually, when Friday arrives and I feature the week’s most outstanding profiles, I have to stop myself from including more than five. So, just to indulge a little more than usual, I’ve include six. I now feel suficiently satiated.   Though most people don’t know how to write personal ads and market themselves (and, as such, can benefit from my marketing expertise and writing), the… read more →

Charlie Sheen isn’t weird or strange. He has a mental illness. What’s really disturbing about the drama being played out around him is that it’s distracting us from celebrities who truly do deserve our punch lines – like William Shatner. I know, I know. I really must leave him alone. He is a leader among Trekkies and he moved so many as spokesperson for All Bran. Now he’s regaling millions…oh okay…a handful…of viewers as host of Raw Nerve. When I… read more →

This is the 9th installment of Online Dating Profiles. The Agony. I actually only expected this series to last for about 6 weeks, but scanning online dating profiles never fails to give me fodder. This week, every person featured makes me believe that I’ve grossly underestimated the mental capacity and eloquence of people like Gary Busey, Mike Tyson and Bjork. Rest assured, most people don’t have profiles that are as outrageous as this week’s features. Truly, the only help most… read more →

Looking at online dating profiles this week I realized that there’s one thing about Sarah Palin that has my complete support and that is: “Book of Collected Wisdom of Sarah Palin”. The book is blank. As I post this 8th installment of “Online Dating. The Agony” I can’t help but think that some people need to stop themselves from publicly posting their dating profiles. Clearly the following profiles have been written without grasping the fact that a dating site is… read more →

I recently read a quote by 23-year old pop star, Ke$ha. It went like this: “I actually don’t read anything, because I feel like the haters really like to hate out loud, [and] that people who love sometimes love quietly. So I don’t really listen or look at anything.” This confused me and I read it several times with the sincere belief that I must be not grasping some subtlety or hidden message. As it turns out, she simply didn’t… read more →