All posts tagged with online dating profiles

You may have noticed that I love giving my opinion. I like being a guest on podcasts; I enjoy writing this blog; I also admit to a special fondness for my $20 service even though I make more money on the $80 one. However, despite my gregarious approach to telling anyone who’ll listen (or read) what I think, there are just some things that you really don’t need to hear from an online dating profile writer. In fact, I’ve compiled… read more →

I noticed that after every episode of Sex and the City new trends would take off. Some of the more memorable ones include cosmopolitans and the very painful, but admittedly neat, Brazilian wax. More recently, the Hills’ Heidi Montag has set the trend for cosmetic surgery over personality while Audrina makes a case for vegetarianism. Then there are the designer home shows that have finally relegated beige and neutral back to their ideal location as the perfect, personality-stripped choice for… read more →

I browse online dating sites on a daily basis. I scan larger ones like Match and Perfect Match. I also scan the smaller niche sites like Brainiac and Jdate. I’m an equal opportunity scanner. Yet, no matter how many different types of singles each site might attract, and no matter where I look, I always find the preachers. Read online dating profiles and I’m sure you’ve seen them too. Here are some of their headlines: Live, love and learn. It’s… read more →

I once accepted a Facebook friend request from someone I worked with periodically. My news feeds thereafter were never the same. This woman would post countless statuses with such gems as: “After a session like that, I wish I smoked. Wink, wink. Oh wait a minute. I was smoking.” I hate puns and I really didn’t need to know that she had just had hot sex. Like certain Facebook statuses and wall comments, online dating profiles can share way too… read more →

I know that we can all kid ourselves. I heard a friend say that he was not really driving fast; it was just that his new car felt lighter. To this day, I have no idea what that means. I have another friend who said that she didn’t get lost on the way to someone’s home. She just didn’t end up where she was supposed to end up. I even had a boyfriend say that the spare tire around his… read more →

There are plenty of things for people to be embarrassed about. I’m sure the Carpenters would re-think their cover of “Calling Occupants of Interplanetary Craft” if they could. Learning how to dive into a pool as an adult could be pretty embarrassing too (though hilarious for onlookers). Making a living as a mascot wouldn’t be something you’d beat your chest about either unless, of course, say it with me…you’re dressed as a gorilla. Lastly, being David Hasselhoff would be pretty… read more →

Have you ever walked into a bar and suddenly members of the opposite sex threw themselves at you – without you even saying a word? Do people see you and automatically assume you’re a babe magnet? Do you find that you get by on your looks alone? If you’ve said no to one of these questions, chances are you’ve said no to all of them. So, when you join an online dating site and do nothing but post a profile… read more →

A friend of mine said that his neighbor’s ex-wife is on the same online dating site that he’s on, and that she sent him a smile. “She’s an older woman”, he said excitedly, “A real cougar”. When I probed further, I learned that she was his age. This same man once said that he keeps meeting women with a lot of wrinkles. Again I probed further only to discover that these wrinkled ladies were his age or, at best, just… read more →

Some online dating profiles are like breasts implants. They look good. They keep your attention. Yet, upon closer inspection, there’s nothing in them that’s real. The big difference is that most people won’t reject you over plastic surgery (unless you’re that horrifying cat lady, Jocelyn Wildenstein, or Carrot Top, or Mickie Rourke.) Point is, while an embellished profile might initially arouse the interest of potential suitors, in the end the ruse will fall flat. No one likes liars. That’s a… read more →

If you ever have trouble falling asleep, scan the dating profiles on any dating site from Match.com to PerfectMatch. They’re a natural sedative. Everyone likes the same things and sounds the same. But, you can be different. You can hire a professional ad writer to write your online dating profile (me!) or you can read the following excerpts and see how average online dating profiles were transformed into great ones. DATING PROFILE SAMPLE 1 I had a client who loved… read more →