All posts tagged with writing your dating profile

This is the 9th installment of Online Dating Profiles. The Agony. I actually only expected this series to last for about 6 weeks, but scanning online dating profiles never fails to give me fodder. This week, every person featured makes me believe that I’ve grossly underestimated the mental capacity and eloquence of people like Gary Busey, Mike Tyson and Bjork. Rest assured, most people don’t have profiles that are as outrageous as this week’s features. Truly, the only help most… read more →

Looking at online dating profiles this week I realized that there’s one thing about Sarah Palin that has my complete support and that is: “Book of Collected Wisdom of Sarah Palin”. The book is blank. As I post this 8th installment of “Online Dating. The Agony” I can’t help but think that some people need to stop themselves from publicly posting their dating profiles. Clearly the following profiles have been written without grasping the fact that a dating site is… read more →

I recently read a quote by 23-year old pop star, Ke$ha. It went like this: “I actually don’t read anything, because I feel like the haters really like to hate out loud, [and] that people who love sometimes love quietly. So I don’t really listen or look at anything.” This confused me and I read it several times with the sincere belief that I must be not grasping some subtlety or hidden message. As it turns out, she simply didn’t… read more →

Once again, this blog features a few rather remarkable online dating profiles. This week, I also – once again – noticed a lot of angry online daters. Why someone thinks a rant will land a good date, I have no idea. But then I’m puzzled by many things, like why faces don’t get goose bumps.   As you read these excerpts, please keep in mind that most people write their dating profiles with an honest effort and they’re not bad.… read more →

Before I paste excerpts of online dating profiles I’ve scanned this week, I need to make this very clear: few people know how to market themselves on dating sites. Most everyone could benefit from the help of a marketing expert and ad writer. People do their best and actually don’t do too badly. However, to really stand out, that’s not enough.   Then there are those who are not like most people – and this will become painfully clear as… read more →

Sometimes, in their endless attempt to fit into modern society, men do dumb things. They try to fix a woman’s problems rather than nod their heads, make eye contact, and act as though they’re paying attention. They start renovation projects when there’s nothing to renovate, or they try to put together the DVD unit (usually after dismantling it out of curiosity). They also learn to play guitar because they think it’ll make them look cool, thus never considering how it… read more →

Most singles dating online write relatively unremarkable dating profiles (reason enough to hire me, a marketing expert and writer, to craft them). Still, a handful write some truly remarkable ones. This week, while scanning the big online dating sites, I found a number of such profiles and, in this third installment of my weekly series, will share excerpts from five of them: Ms Christian Gurl says: THERE IS ONLY ONE PERFECT MAN AND THATS JESUS BUT SOMEWHERE OUT THERE IS… read more →

It’s the end of the week. Time for me to share the “hurts so good” moments I’ve had over the past 7 days while scanning online dating profiles. Bear in mind that these dating profiles do not reflect the average person, and are most likely suggestive of inbreeding. BFF wrote: IS THEIR ANY GOOD GUYS LEFT?? WHY IS ALL GUYS ON HERE JUST LOOKING FOR A PIECE OF ASS???Im looking for a guy that knows how to treat a lady.… read more →

I once worked for someone who, for some unintelligible reason, decided that a picture of a 1950’s clown on a print ad for 20-year old adrenaline junkies would be funny. It wasn’t. It made no sense at all. The only thing funny was how bad the ad was. This same person was also pretty pleased with himself for coming up with an ad that made reference to the TV show “Twin Peaks” even though the ad was designed for people… read more →

Does the headline on your dating profile actually matter? According to most online dating “experts”, it does. As a marketing expert, I say it doesn’t – not when it comes to dating profiles. The reason why a headline in an print ad or bus board matters so much is because you have seconds to distract people from whatever it is they’re doing and get them to pay attention to you. Rarely do people open a newspaper because they’re objective is… read more →