Today I scanned some dating profiles on Zoosk. I found one that I couldn’t pass up the chance of critiquing.
Though an excerpt, it nonetheless represents the essence of this man’s dating profile.
When you read it, you’ll see for yourself that it’s poorly crafted. Yet, I’ve seen countless variances of this kind of approach. The mistakes are surprisingly common.
Excerpt from the profile of a man in his mid-30s:
I have met a lot of great ladies on this site and am really enjoying it. I am very musical! I love live music. I hope to meet that special someone who will be a good compliment to my life. So here I am trying again. I know your out there. Humor is really important to me too.
My Critique
For one, don’t start off saying that you’ve been enjoying a lot of dates. That makes you sound like a player or very picky. Neither is makes for a good impression.
Next, stay focused! Don’t go from dating to music back to dating and then, out of nowhere, onto humor. Stay on point.
Third, never say “I’m trying again”. It’s not positive.
Finally, learn when to use your and you’re. There’s no excuse for this.
A final note about writing your online dating profile.
If finding the right one truly matters to you, then hire a professional – me. I’ve spent my life writing ad copy. As such, I’m trained to find your best traits and then put them forward in an engaging way.
Better still, because I ask a lot of questions, I’m able to use your words and anecdotes so that the profile is true to you.
Check out my online dating profile samples and see for yourself. Better yet, get started by completing the personality questionnaire and then submit your answers to me. You’ll be amazed at what I can do with them.
